i'm bisexual.
Submitted by destiny.m on Mon, 09/28/2009 - 00:44
I've been Bi since i was 12. I'm 15 now. I haven't told my parents. Most of my friends know i'm bisexual but i've lost some friend because of it. Some girls mess with me because of it high school is painful. my parents are religious and they won't like the fact that I'm half of the rainbow. My sister won't like it. My brothers won't like it. No one will.
I don't know what to do anymore. I've changed so much since i was that age. If i were to tell my parents one day how will i tell them i like girls and boys.
will they abandon me? what will happen..
well, i am also like her, and my whole family know's about really good, because i am so out there. I do'nt care what the whole world's saying.
I'm so sorry!! I can't imagine what that must be like, I am out to my whole family,and they all okay with it!!
I don't have answers to your questions, but I would love to talk to you and help you about this.
if you are comfortable posting your e-mail, and you want to talk......
I'm not saying I will have great answers,but I'm great at just being here :-)
I am not out to some of my friends, because I'm afraid it will be weird between us, and I don't want that.
I wish you all the best!!
hey im a lesbian & my life didnt change when i came out but i can help u & give u some answers...
ok u say u lost some friends?? then u know they were never real friends. u dont want to surround yourself around ppl who cant except u for u.
well i know it seems like the whole world will be against u but u will soon learn that they will come around your there child & they should love u unconditionally no matter what..
tell them one at a time mom first or the coolest one lol i would say ease it in. & just tell them that u like girls as well & tell them its the person u like u dont really look at the gender its just who makes u happy be honest & strong about it & they will respect u more it takes alot of courage but onces it's out it's out & u will eventually feel better & everything happens for a reason whatever happen just try to think positive & dont beat yourself up so much..i hope i helped & if u post again i will try my best to help again good luck & be strong =]
Well I don't live with my parents but my aunt is a very religious person. When I told her I was bi she hated it and she started with the bible.I knew she wouldn't accept it but I just wanted to be honest. I didn't care what she thought about me after. Its your life so don't put it on hold for anyone else.
Wow i am so shocked that i found another person like me. I am in the exact situation and i have no clue what to do i wanna tell my mom so bad but i know she'll probably kick me out. I told my younger brother who is in the 7th grade and he sometimes black mails me with it and my older bro knows too. I am currently with a guy and have been since 1/19/09 mu friends know that i am bi and i have lost friends cuz of it but tell u the truth losing friends doesn't worry me, friends come and go but family is forever. I have to hide myself everyday because my mom would never except it. If i tell her when i am older she can't kick me out but she will probably never speak to me again. My boyfriend knows and he isn't one of those sick pervs who thinks girl on girl action is hot. He supports me and that's probably all the support i can get from anyone, well him and my friends. My uncle and i once got into a huge fight because of this whole situation, i was standing up for LBGT and he hates them and i never talked to him again until now and even then its still pretty akward between us. Just remember u can alwaysz talk to me, i know what ur going through. xoxo_ gigglyheart01850
If you like being the way you are then why you it matter? your question is "but its my parents?" i know i've never been in your situation but i have a friend that is bi since she was in 7th grade and now is 15 like you at first when i met her in 8th i didnt know she was bi beacuse she was afraid what i will think of her but eventually i found out when i saw her kissing a girl i was shocked not beacause i found out she was bi but beacause she didnt tell me at first. i started tlking to her that how i found out that she was bi. and i didnt really care much but wht you parents i think they'll understand if you try explaining that it wasnt your choice it just came naturally. and i hope everything goes good. if not im her. Doctor C. Aka Ashliey Corona.
You never know what they're going to say . But they're your family && should love you no matter what . One of my best friends is bi && she's also scared to tell her family . When she told me I was shocked at first , but then I came to realize she's still the same person , && people shouldn't look at you differently because of your sexuality . Your family may be shocked at first but eventually they should accept you for who you are (:
hey if u want someone who's been there done that, with basically everything parent-gay. friend-gay related u can email me. [email removed by admin]
I know how hard it is to come out to friends and family. It's never really easy useless you know for a fact that they will be ok with it.
Usually in families they are shocked at first and will refuse to accept that part of ur life if they are super into church like mine. But all in all they will still love you. I think if anything they will try to egnore your sexuality. But as time passes they might be more open to the idea. But you have to remember that it's not always easy for them. They grew up in a different time, and they are used to their own set of ways. so you have to also learn to be patient with them as they learn something about you that they didnt before.
First of all, the only person's acceptance you should look for is yours. You have not done anything wrong and your sexuality is a part of you. If the people in your life cannot accept that, that is their choice. But remember that you always have yours... So stand strong against the doubts that you have and know that those who truly love you will accept you as you are.
"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind."-Dr. Seuss
if anyone has trouble please emailme @ [email removed by admin]
If you have questions of need to talk to someone, the Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender (GLBT) National Youth Talk line is great. Their number is: 1-800-246-7743
This is a line where people under 25 can talk to other people of the same age about coming-out issues.
I am sixteen and I have been bisexual since I was 13, I told my parents last year when I was fifteen, I had to consider every aspect, I was thinking that my mom would feel the same as you think your parents would. One day we were driving to the store, I told her in the car in the middle of a conversation, I said would you still love me if I were gay or bi, she said nothing would change her love for me, she has always had dreams of mee getting married to a man and having children, but she respects my sexuality. As for my dad, I havn't told him directly, it is on my myspace and facebook that I am bi, but I am afraid to tall him face to face even though I am pretty sure, he's found out already. My advice would be to talk to them seperatley, I talked to my mom in the car so she couldn't avoid the subject or walk away from the conversation, but you just have to be prepared to hear what they have to say, they may not love the fact that you're bi, but they will still love you no matter what.
Its good that most of your freinds support you and take you for who you are. I've been in a pretty big state of confusion since I was about 11 about my sexuality, I'm going to be 16 this year. I've always known I like guys and I fell in love with one this year much to my own regret.I think i'm bisexual, it's sounds stupid but I don't know how you tell. I don't normally facny girls. I have a freind who's bi and I sort of liked her but I don't know if thats just cause I think she might have feelings for me or something. For the first time in my life I think I like this straight girl. I really don't know what to do, I'm so tired of years of confusion. I'm afraid to experiment with any girl unless they freaked out and told everyone. I don't know how I can be with anyone without coming out, but I keep thinking, what if I tell people and I'm wrong? I know that none of you can tell me how I feel but I was wondering if you've ever been in this type of situation before, any advice? Noone knows. I'm also afraid to tell my friends, we're all so close and they're always joking around about liking each other but it's all a laugh. I try to avoid joking about it with them because I'm afraid if I tell them that they'll think I actually liked them that way and they'd get freaked out. I just don't know what to do.
This is it, this is life, this is all there is.
my advice (im also bi, im 22) but I do know that parents need some time to get used to the idea their kid might be gay. id say write them a letter or an email so you can truely express yourself without dealing with their initial negative reaction. then it gives them time to hear it how you wanted it and to let it sink in and get used to the idea.
I understand what u are going through..my friends here are bi and they alwasy get made fun off or something... i think that they should be able to be who they want to be....but i am not bi but i hate seeing them kinds getting picked on for it......
i was confused on my sexuality last year(my freshman year) of high school. i have come to terms that im ya know, bi. but i dont know what my family would think because they never really talk about gays and stuff. i kno that my grandmother doesnt like gay people but i say slowly tell them. and give them some time to adjust to the new you.
Well im straight but have to say that you being bi sexual should be your own business and it is BUT ur parents getting mad should not be right. Is that how a true christian is now days? do they judge based on the sex you like? God loves you either way and i dont care who says im wrong. You are who you are and dont let anybody who knows get you down! Stay strong and be yourself! ive got your back all the way and you have my support
im 15 and my best friend jus told me that she was in love with a girl. It was kind of ackward at first, but I love her like a sister so what else am I supposed to do, she's been there for me when I lost friends. So if your family really loves you like you say they do, then they will accept you for who you are.
Ashlee92, why are you on this site?? You need to learn how to be more nice in life. Someone's asking for advice, dont come on here and say this kind of stuff! God accepts people for who they are. Since your such a homophobe why dont you just keep ur opinions to yourself because no one wants to here your CRAP!
I dont know how to answer your question because iam not gay or bisexual. but i have nothing against them and iam willing to help in any way
Aussychick14, I completely agree! Bigotry is not welcome here!
If we all report ashlee92, we can get her removed from this site.
Just click the "report this page" button, beneath her remarks, and copy and paste this into the "why are you reporting this page?" box:
"Open bigotry, homophobia, vulgar Language, Discrimination, Disrespect and cyber bullying!"
It's really easy, and takes about 2 seconds! Also, if you can think of any other words to describe the disturbing behavior of ashlee92, feel free to also post that in the "why are you reporting this page?" box, also, post them in the discussion!
ok one ashlee92 get some things straight. Your hating people is also in the bible under God's "I don't like this list" so if we are going to hell for being who we are then so are you. because people are suposed to love Everyone, says so in the bible. You can have your opinions on how you think people should live but you have no right to tell people how to live and who to love. and FYI this girl is going through a hard time and its crap like what your saying that makes people depressed, and in some cases puts people in danger.Because some homophobics do take it to far. ona nd another thing I'm a CHRISTIAN and I'm a TRANSGENDER FTM. and I know God loves me.
~Shane
[This comment was deleted by a DoSomething.org administrator]
ashlee92,
Although this is an improvement from your previous bigotry, and I have no concept of what might have shifted your opinion so drastically, I would still like to say that your statement is a little on the unfair side. Although I do not know you in real life, on this forum alone I have seen you write of sex with your boyfriend, which, I admit, I do not like the sound of, but I have no quarrel with it. However, you would say it would be wrong if I talked of sex with my girlfriend, why? Shouldn't I have the same right as you?
I completely agree as far as not trying to persuade anyone to have different sexual preferences then they do, although I would again state that although no gay people on this site have suggested that you become gay, you have told all gay people on this site that what they do is wrong, do these double standards prevail as fair in your humble opinion?
If your parents kick you out, or abodon you because of what you believe is right, then shame on them because love is not about some ones sexuality, its about what they feel for eachother inside and how much they care about someone a partner a child, ect. your parents should supprt your desicsion because in the end its your life your going to have to control not theirs. confide in your family, tell them what u feel, talk it over hear them out they'll hear you out. we all have growing up to do and your not done changing hopefully your parents will understand.
xoxo sweetmaria11
i couldn't agree more, although i have not been kicked out of my home, my aunt and uncle are acting more in denial than anything...
To be honest, no one can predict how your family will react, not even you, not even them. You need to know however, that honesty between your family and yourself is one of the most important building blocks of that relationship, they think you're telling them everything. You know you aren't.
There is no good way to just out right say you're bisexual, I know its kind of tough. I am bi as well so I know how you feel and what you're going through. I will give this advice to you,
Have a plan, and a back up plan, and a back up to your back up. Practice with a supportive friend what you'd like to say, its like a speech, but more casual and a lot more stressful/important. Make sure incase something goes wrong, or not as you planned it you ahve somewhere you could go, whether it be permenant, or somewhere to stay while your parents think and react to what you've told them. Make sure if you're dependant on them for survival, you'd be able to survive without them JUST INCASE. Finally make sure you pick a good time, maybe make sure that your parents had a good day, or you do something nice for them like make dinner. Ease their load before dropping something like this on them, so to speak. Coming out to your parents honestly is the single most difficult thing you will ever do, friends its a lot easier, because they're not your flesh and blood, you don't live with them, they don't control your life, but most importantly they didn't raise you. This is my most important piece of advice for you, make sure you see their side as well. This is not only hard for you, but equally hard for your parents. They made you, gave birth to you, raised you and now have to know the dreams they had for created for you during that time, may be forever gone. Give them time, be patient and be prepared for this to get a little tense. Let them react in their own way and time. Don't force anything.
**I am not saying this will happen to you, just INCASE it does, because things like this are very sensitive and unpredictable.
I hope this helped you a little. Always remember whether they get mad or don't like it, deep down regardless of if they show it or not they really do still love you no matter what, its unconditional, and that never goes away.
mmm...... i may not be in that situation but i feel for ya.... you shouldnt be scared to tell ur family.. because they are ur family! thats what they are there for.. its a concious decision you've made and if your gonna stick with it then u need to get it out there and be proud of it! You can only be yourself when everyone else wknows who you realy are, and keeping it a secret from ur family just pulls you more and more in the shaddows every day.. its easier said than done i know. But sometimes you just have to do something about it.. its okay :) once you get it out it'll be waaay easier..
That's Hard To Deal With. And I Understand You. I think That You Should Tell Your Mom. You Should Be Scared It's Not Like You Choised To Be Bisexual. And You Know Who Your Real Friends Are Now. And They Will Be There For You..
dont worry bout wat others think or say. u can only be 1 person n thats ur self. if ur ok with being bi then so will others. as long as u respect ur self n dont let ppl tell u who n wat u r thingx will be fine. everything will fall into place. those girlx who bother u there just insecure wit themselves.
i can see wat ur sayin im bi 2 and my family doesnt knw my cousin is as well and when she came out they disowned her and my brother knws but hes cool with it wat i think u should do and im only thinking but talk ur parents into it dont just rush into it it takes time 4 sufff like this 2 let them forget and forgive but most likely they will knw that ur uu no matter who u love
Um i would say to tell them now you have waited lonh enough you have to tell them before someonelse does your friends no and what if they slip up and then it spreads around tell them because they are your family adn if there religious thay will act in a christian manner towards the situation some people think diffrently if i was your mom i would learn to embrace it it will be hard at first but they iwll accept it or try to change your mind you will never know unless you try
I say tell them. It's going to be hard but you are who you are.
I've been in your shoes, some my friends left and some stuck by me and in the end they still love me for who I am.
Your parents will take it hard, all do when there kid comes out the closet, but if they can't accepet you for who you are do what you think is best for you in life.
~Tree~ hi mii name iz trey im dealing with the same exact thing.My sister blackmails me all the time. im sixteen and is moving out next year close to mii b-day. i always need someone to talk to,my number is 337-636-5330. to gigglyheart
My sisters bi too. All the way back until i can remember, my dad made gay jokes. They wont like it. but they will still love you. Even though it may not seem that way at first, they will. Your a big girl and can make your own choices and thet cant change that. It might be akward at first but soon enough they will accept it and be okay with it because they will realize its a part of you.
Good Morning,
I'm sorry to hear that, because my bestfriend had the same issue, except we were 18 at the time. My best friend feared that her parents wouldn't accept her being bi-sexual, so she held it in and tried to hide it for 18 years. It was tough I'm sure, being that she didn't tell me until we were 17, and she had been my bestfriend since the 3rd grade. However, I had to convince my bestfriend to tell her parents. She feared facing her parents, but I could see how much being bi-sexual was affecting her. She felt alone, and I understood, but not as much as she had wanted me to being that I'm hetrosexual. She began to feel alone and empty, and I'm sure you feel the same way, being that you have people who pick on you at school. That is not right, by the way, I wish people were not so judgemental. Furthermore, what it all boils down too is that, my bi-sexual bestfriend ended up telling her mother & father, and they were a little upset, but it was weight lifted off her shoulders. Her parents are now more accepting of her sexual idenity (bi-sexual), even though they don't approve, her family now shows her unconditional love. My advice would be to find a friend that could help you map a plan on how to express your feelings to your parents. Although it may be hard, it's better to have it off of your chest, so that eventually they'll accept it and your identity. Once your family understands, it won't matter to you very much about those kids at school, because when you have the support of your parents, it feels great. In addtion, I learned in my PSY/240 course that bi-sexual and homosexual orientation and identity is not a choice, but is definied by gentics. For example, it's not your fault that your bi-sexual, it is a trait that you did not choose, but was more or less choosen for you before you could even speak words: as a child. You may want to look it up, so you can feel more secure, about your sexual preference, being that gentics, play a major role in weither or not a person is hetrosexual, homosexual, or bi-sexual.
Good luck, I wish you the best,
~ Keep Dreams Alive ~
Hi, I know exactly where you are coming from. I've been in this exact situation. I was so afraid to tell my family that I actually left home, beat myself up, and refused to acknowledge my sexuality (which I do NOT recommend either of these). I am now 24 and finally happy with myself. My family accepts me, even if they don't like my lifestyle. In my opinion, You need to do what makes YOU happy, don't hurt yourself over anyone else's opinions. Your family has unconditional love for you, and will learn to accept you for who you are. My family is also very religious, but I stress that the bible (no matter how many people want to argue this fact) says nothing about bisexuality, or homosexuality being wrong, It's proven all through out history, homosexuality was much more acceptable in Biblical times than it is now (how messed up is that!).
There are many options out there for help sweetie, remember you are never alone! Also, you are who you are, never try to make yourself something you are not, it just hurts you more.
i have friends who are bi nd it nuttin to me jus noe dhat if dhey are yhur true frends then they will still be by your side
Hello, I'm a bisexual girl and I have seen the signs for as long as I can remember. I suggest you tell your parents. They love you, and who you love isn't going to change that. I would say it's better to tell them now then to worry about it for the rest of your life. Don't wait until you have a same gender relationship to spring it on them. They deserve a fair warning. Just set them down and let them know. It will lift a huge weight off of your shoulders.
I wish I could tell my parents that I'm bi, but my dad won't let my boyfriend in the house becuase he thinks he's gay (he's bi, but my dad doesn't know that). I don't think I want to get kicked out just yet... >.<
Does anyone know why all of the more recently posted forums all say that they've been moved? I don't get it...
{Taytay's Vampyre Princess}
I so feel you girl and trust me EVERY SINGLE WORD you just said is exactly what I'm coin through I can't tell Anybody and it sucks but since were going through the same thing maybe we can help ea h other out. If you do could you please email me
The subject of bisexuals and their treatment makes me so mad. People need to grow the frick up and realize OH HEYYY THIS PERSON CAN'T HELP IT SAYY WHAT THIS IS HOW THEY WERE MADE?! GOD MADE HER?! SO IT WAS GODS CHOICE?! OH. MAYBE I SHOULD ACCEPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPT HER/HIM THEN.
ugh-.- but yeah, bisexuals don't need to be ashamed of it. I'm straight but jesus christ if these people can't accept it then um... they're... :X
If you've lost friends because of it, they weren't really your friends. Your real friends can accept you the way you are heck I'd be your friend if I knew you, I wouldn't care if you were bi. I wouldn't even mind if you were straight out lesbian and I'm a girl. What difference does it make? You like girls and boys? Okay, you're still you. The fact that people judge people on their sexual preferences makes me want to shoot someone with a slingshot. Why can't we just like people for their personalities? I honestly don't get why people do that.
btw I'm 13 and this is what I think-.- stupid homophobes.
lol oh yeah- GOD LOVES EVERYONE. ABSOLUTELY NOTHING IS SAID AGAINST GAYS, LESBIANS, OR BISEXUALS. So homophobes can go cry to their moms.
Hi my name is jasmine , and ism not going to judge you or nothing i just hope you can found a place in your family without them judging you. Just sit down and talk to you parents and family ,and tell him how you feel.
im bisexual to. i just came out bout to my friends a couple days ago and they didnt care. i have a girlfriend now who was my bff but now she is my girlfriend. my family has some people who are lesbos and gays but my fam has never been supportive of me and i know they will react differnetly if i ever tell them. as of right now i feel like they dont need to know because im only 14 and things could change. i have changed alot since i was 10 years old. and it is very hard to keep this from my family but im doing what i gotta do. be strong and im sure everything will be ok.